Hannah, being the green young thing that she is, takes plastic bags to the supermarket in order to reuse them when she shops. This creates a mixture of bemusement and at times complete chaos (”That doesn’t fit our system! Where do we put them? This can’t be hygenic!”).

The other day she popped into a megastore that shall remain nameless and at the checkout pulled out her bags and started packing. The cashier, without a pause in item scanning, simply asked, “So then, how are you settling into America?”!

She was completely thrown for a moment, then of course realised that we fit into the “eccentric English family” category and thus would be well known, even in the vast warehouse that is our local hypermarket. “We’re doing great, thank you. How y’all doing?” she enquired in her charmingly pastoral manner.

To complete the recycling day, Isaac came home that evening with a school project that he missed at the end of last term, namely to create a snowman that could be hung up at school. Apparently all the efforts so far submitted involved mountains of cotton wool and buttons for eyes. We discussed the matter at the dinner table, seeking a less dull interpretation, and the big brothers suggested raiding the recycling box. So Isaac went into school the next day with “Isaac’s Green Snowman”, made from a tin foil pie dish, a huge yogurt lid and lots of different coloured tops from bottles as nose and buttons, with wire to hang it from. He was carefully coached in how to respond to the “Why have you called it a green snowman when it’s white and silver?” question. We look forward to seeing what grade he is given!

As BW people know all too well, last week Oklahoma was at the epicentre of a huge ice storm in central North America.

The impact has been huge. Around half of the state has lost power at some point (for multiple hours upwards). Currently, Monday 17th, over 125,000 homes and businesses are still powerless (including our ever-so-slightly smelly Joel Limpic!). The completely overwhelmed power companies say it could take up to another week to reconnect all homes.

At least 24 people have died in the state as a direct result of the ice, mainly from traffic accidents and botched, improvised attempts to keep warm at home. Some of the advice to people on TV had at times sounded almost comical - “don’t use your BBQ grill indoors” - until stories of carbon monoxide poisoning and house fires began to roll in and the realisation dawned that people have died from having done so in the last few days.

People have seemed remarkably stoical and positive. From the various conversations we’ve had in shops and our neighbourhood, as well as through the church, there is what we Brits would call the Blitz spirit shining through! People have been helping each other out and sharing homes and resources, and so far we’ve not had stories of people dying through lack of care from others. Of course the children enjoyed the schools being shut down - ours were very annoyed to find our local school reopening last Wednesday ahead of some other parts of the metropolitan area!

For lighter distraction we’ve also enjoyed the antics of the local weathermen, with each channel outdoing the other with their forecasts. The local stations even have special little logos and stirring music to go with reports, and we have rolling lists on screen of cancelled events and closed schools, businesses and churches (still weird to see for a European). It is slightly a case of deja-vu for Hannah and myself, since we experienced an ice storm in January when we were here on interview, although that one caused far less chaos. That January Sunday did win the prize for lowest church attendance though - I think there were about 37 of us in the building that day, the frozen chosen!! Apparently January was (relatively) less troublesome because it was colder then. Sounds counter-intuitive, I know, but apparently when it remains fairly warm the ice repeatedly melts and refreezes, which causes far more damage than if it stays frozen until the final thaw.

Of course, something like this makes you reflect upon what a privileged life we all usually lead. When our power went down, fortunately for only 9 or 10 hours, so much of our normal life and creature comforts went with it. We couldn’t even flush the loo or have running water, since like many homes in our area our water comes from a well that is powered by an electric pump. That evening we lit a fire and sat around it with the boys, talking and playing games. Before their bedtime we each said thank You to God for some of the many good things we enjoy in our lives. We take so much for granted and treat those gifts as rights, not privileges. Hopefully next time I’ll be slightly less quick to snarl when my webpage doesn’t load as quickly as I want or the exact type of cereal I desire has run out. Not very deep, I know, but it’s on such small attitudes that I need to work if I’m to have any hope with the truly important things of life.

We’ve been having an ongoing Absalom conversation about the quantities of sugar in the American diet. Everything is so sweetened here and we’re not just talking about ice creams and chocolates (in as far as you can call Hersheys chocolate). To a European palate, American bread is sweetened to taste more like cake, salads are generally delivered to your restaurant table swimming in sugared dressings (this being the South, albeit masked by a spiced up BBQ flavour), and fruit is served not as dessert but alongside meat and vegetables as something ’savoury’. Recently Hannah went out to lunch with a few of her friends and was served a scone and lemon curd as an appetizer (she did the American thing and asked for a take-out box to bring it home in! It was then eaten at the proper time - for afternoon tea). Meanwhile I was at a working lunch the other day and the bread to accompany my soup was homemade Danish pastries. Delicious, but odd. Maybe that could be the new motto for the dollar bill?

Hannah’s latest thesis is that the USA must surely consume more than half of the world’s total sugar production. I think it would be so, except for the quantity of sugar that my Indian friends put in their tea.

So I’ve done a little research. Annual sugar consumption per person in the UK in the 1600’s was about 7 lb. Jumping the Atlantic, by the early 1800’s in the USA it was about 12 lbs per year, in 1980 it had shot up to 124lb, in 1997 it was 152lb, whilst today presumably (and judging by the average girth) the figure has continued its inexorable upwards progression.

In case I lost you there, this means the typical American consumes half a pound of sugar each day and over 5 tons in a lifetime.

Second helpings, anyone?

Common table sugar represents about 20 to 25 percent of the daily calorific intake of the average American. It is estimated that 75 percent of all sugar consumed comes from processed food. All this has an impact. As USA Today charmingly put it, “Children’s consumption of soft drinks is up nearly 500% since the 1950s. And kids are fatter than ever.”

The same newspaper reported recently that requiring larger belt sizes costs Americans about $36.5 billion per year, which equates to the amount of money needed to fund 730,000 more school teachers. Whilst this does sound an implausibly high figure ($100 a year per person??), nevertheless even if it’s only 10% of that sum, it is enormous. Oh yes, and there’s the little thing that studies have linked a high sugar intake with an increased risk of diabetes, cardiovascular disease, cancer, and premature aging.

But the good news is that everyone here has perfectly straight teeth.

As one of our English friends emailed to us, “I’ve been reading your blog with great amusement! You’ve settled in a strange land… which is quite biblical I suppose.”

Oklahomans having been telling us since we arrived about the great cultural icon that is the Oklahoma State Fair - and you weren’t wrong!

We went down on opening day to soak up the sights, sounds and smells. There are all the usual things we’d expect from what it originates from, namely the English county show - animal showing, riding competitions, best of breed, lightest Victoria Sponge cake, largest potato, nobbliest carrot, etc. Of course, the categories shift to a southern US format, so events include “Quilting”, “Rubber Stamping”, “Table Setting Contest – Adult Division” (very competitive, apparently, so kids have to be kept away for their own well-being - you can’t have them being traumatised by a sabotaged napkin), and for cutting edge students there is the “OU/OSU Best Decorated Tennis Shoe Contest”. Something for Zak and Jessica to introduce on Sunday mornings, perhaps…

Then comes the food contests, which is where the true battles are slugged out. Real events include “State Championship Chilli Cook-off”, “Pillsbury Refrigerated Pie Crust Pie Baking Championship” (a wonderful insight into the American psyche about cooking - you may have bought the product, but if you serve it then it’s your cooking and you receive the credit), “The Great American SPAM Championship” (cue Monty Python song) and “Stick with Canola Oil Fry it for the Fair Contest” (which obviously is a tautology, since everything for the fair is fried).

Entertainment at the fair above all revolves around food, mostly defined by the absence of anything of nutritional benefit and the presence of hugely inflated prices. There are stalls selling fried meat, some portions of which still have their choke chains attached, and other outlets with all types of sweet goodies, notably of course funnel cake. Between staggering from food counters, we watched “genuine” displays of “authentic” Native American culture. The presenters had all the energy of octogenarians at a school sports day, looking as if they really didn’t want to be there showing us paleskins their history. However, the Swifty Swine Racing Pigs (yes, really) proved very exciting viewing.

The evening ended watching the fabulous live free concert from… The Village People! Yes, they are still together, fairly sedentary, hanging onto their microphone stands somewhat heavily after any exertion, the lead singer splitting the seam in his leather pants before the first song even started, but banging out those 70 disco tunes with lots of enthusiasm. Macho, macho man!

Last Sunday Hannah and I did the talk together at Bridgeway. We started off by saying some of the things that we’d noticed about Oklahoma culture - both good and, shall we say, more interesting! We’ve written them up for you to critique - or to add your own suggestions of things we should be looking out for!

H: People are genuinely friendly
A: At public events people not only know but sing the words to the song Oklahoma!
H: Customer service is much better
A: Everyone likes to wish you a great day
H: The weather is WAY better
A: School buses are a genius idea
H: The standard of living is higher
A: You’re rightly proud of your city and state
H: People love flying the flag - everywhere
A: The plural form of y’all seems to be “all y’all”
H: Everything is big (incl stomachs)
A: It’s the law that every household has to own at least one pick-up truck
H: People actually like country & western music
A: Your do brew beer, but it’s terrible
H: Homer Simpson is a real person
A: Tea which has gone cold should be poured away, not drunk with ice cubes & two lbs of sugar
H: Everyone has great teeth
A: You like shooting things. Preferably from the back of your pick-up, whilst drinking 3% Budweiser
H: Most Americans think they do a great English accent. Please keep them coming, we find them jolly entertaining!